一、翻译一则英语笑话

一日上街不慎与一老外相撞， 忙说：I am sorry。 对不起 老外应道：I am sorry too。 我也很抱歉（这里将too理解为了two) 某人听后又道：I am sorry three。 (所以又这里的three) 老外不解，问：What are you sorry for? (同理这里将for理解为了four) 某人无奈，道：I am sorry five。 这笑话的重点就在于同音词的妙处哈..

二、求守望者中罗夏自述过的小丑笑话的中英文对照版

I heard joke once.

Man goes to doctor, says he’s depressed, life seems harsh and cruel, says he feels all alone in threatening world.

Doctor says treatment is simple, “The great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him. That should pick you up.”

Man bursts into tears, “But doctor,” he says. “I am Pagliacci.”

我听过一个笑话。

说一个男人去看医生，说他很沮丧，人生看起来很无情、很残酷，说他在这个充满威胁的世界上觉得很孤独。

医生说疗法很简单，“伟大的小丑帕格里亚齐来了，去看他的表演吧。他能让你振作起来的。”

那男人突然大哭，“但是医生”，他说，“我就是帕格里亚齐”。

三、最后生还者莱莉活着吗

没有活着。莱莉在剧中的设定是死了，艾莉由于免疫力，活了下来。最后生还者是由游戏工作室顽皮狗第二团队秘密开发两年的作品，讲述了人类因现代传染病而面临绝种危机，当环境从废墟的都市再度自然化时，幸存的人类为了生存而自相残杀的故事。

在《最后生还者》游戏中，莱莉并没有死亡，而是被艾莉救下并一起生活。在电视剧中，莱莉被艾莉救下后，被一群感染者包围，被困在了一辆车里。但是，她并没有被感染者攻击，而是被艾莉和汤米所救。因此，莱莉在电视剧中也没有死亡。

四、关于保持健康的英语小笑话。（程度为六、七年级）

A man goes to church and starts talking to God. He says: God, what is a million dollars to you? and God says: A penny, then the man says: God, what is a million years to you? and God says: a second, then the man says: God, can I have a penny? and God says In a second

一男子进入教堂和上帝对话.他问:主啊, 一百万美元对你意味着多少?上帝回答:一便士.男子又问:那一百万年呢?上帝说:一秒钟.最后男子请求道:上帝,我能得到一便士吗?上帝回答:过一秒钟.

allybaby

Once two hunters went hunting in the forest. One of them suddenly fell down by accident. He showed the whites of his eyes and seemed to have ceased breathing. The other hunter soon took out his mobile phone to call the emergency center for help. The operator said calmly:First, you should make sure that he is already dead. Then the operator heard a gunshot from the other end of the phone and next he heard the hunter asking:What should I do next?

两个猎人进森林里打猎，其中一个猎人不慎跌倒，两眼翻白，似已停止呼吸。另一个猎人赶紧拿出手机拨通紧急求助电话。接线员沉着地说：“第一步，要先确定你的朋友已经死亡。”于是，接线员在电话里听到一声枪响，然后听到那猎人接着问：“第二步怎办？”

Two roaches having a discussion

Two roaches were munching on garbage in an alley when one engages a discussion about a new restaurant.

I was in that new restaurant across the street, said one. It's so clean! The kitchen is spotless, and the floors are gleaming white. There is no dirt anywhere--it's so sanitary that the whole place shines.

Please, said the other roach frowning. Not while I'm eating!

3 Dick was seven years old, and his sister, Catherine, was five. One day their mother took them to their aunt's house to play while she went to the big city to buy some new clothes.

The children played for an hour, and then at half past four their aunt took Dick into the kitchen. She gave him a nice cake and a knife and said to him, Now here's a knife, Dick. Cut this cake in half and give one of the pieces to your sister, but remember to do it like a gentleman.

Like a gentleman? Dick asked. How do gentlemen do it?

They always give the bigger piece to the other person. answered his aunt at once.

Oh said Dick. He thought about this for a few seconds. Then he took the cake to his sister and said to her,Cut this cake in half, Catherine..

迪克年龄七岁，他的妹妹凯瑟琳五岁。一天，妈妈把他们带到姨妈家去玩，自己就到大城市去买些新的衣服。

孩子们玩了个把小时，在四点半的时候，姨妈领着迪克走进了厨房。她交给迪克一块精美的蛋糕和一把刀子，并对他说：“喏，迪克，给你刀子，把这块蛋糕一切为二，给你妹妹一块。不过，你得记住要做得像一个绅士那样。”

迪克问：“像一个绅士？绅士怎样做呢？”

他姨妈马上回答说：“绅士总是把大的一块让给别人的。”

迪克说了一声“噢”。他对此想了一会，然后，他把蛋糕拿给妹妹，并对她说：“凯瑟琳，你来把这块蛋糕一切为二吧。”